NICOLE KIDMAN SAYS TOM CRUISE IS TURNING THEIR KIDS AGAINST HER

Back through the mists of time when Tom Cruise was a big film star and Nicole Kidman could pick a decent script, the two stars adopted some children. Since the divorce the children, called Bella and Connor, have lived with Tom and not seen that much of Nicole as she's travelled the world making cack films and getting knocked up by a country singer called Urban. Worse, the kids call Katie Holmes 'Mum', which must be confusing as Holmes can only be about a year older than they are.

Of course the fact Nicole doesn't see much of Bella and, um, the other one, is actually Tom's fault! Yes!

She's been telling anyone who'll listen in interviews that the sprogs have been "manipulated by their father" to distance them from her.

Now is it just us, or is her logic slightly flawed: if she had time to see her kids at all then Cruise wouldn't be able to manipulate them would he?